2025

I swear I've been waiting for this year for a year. 2024 kicked my ass. As one of Saturn's children (literally and astrologically - I have an Aquarius stellium and Saturn square Sun nataly AND my parents are both Capricorn & Aquarius) I can say that the ass kicking was not welcomed but appreciated. I appreciate hard work. I appreciate being forced to face my fears and my shadows. I appreciate the strength I feel being brought to my knees, very scared, very insecure and unsure of my future, and coming out the other side with more love, faith, humility, strength and wisdom. Better equipped. Less charged. Some major upheavals occurred in my business behind the scenes that mirrored some major upheavals within myself. I am no stranger to this! There are a multitude of aspects in my chart that confirm my desire to constantly transform & evolve. I have no issue burning everything to the ground for what's right. For the truth. My truth. I of course have fears about starting over or big change but I am more "afraid" I guess you could say of living inauthentically or rather, I am repulsed by it. I don't think I am capable of it? Because I need to feel good with me. I need to KNOWWW this is exactly where I'm at, how I feel, who I am, right now, and that's who I need to be. So whatever needs to go, whatever doesn't feel right when I sit in the energy of it, BYE. Because I can't unsee or unfeel an untruth. (I don't care if these are words or not let's keep going..) So yes, being forced to use my voice in making big changes in my company. Saying goodbye to people who no longer energetically align. I say being forced because I am a deeply loyal person and again, I don't love change. Initially. I'm usually better for it but I am fixed dominant and I usually have to be so sick of my own shit or something major needs to happen or feel majorly disgustingly OFF to make a big change. So, something major DID happen AND I felt majorly disgustingly misaligned with people in my work life so I was forced to initiate some major, uncomfortable change. I was challenged time and again. Felt like quitting and moving in with my mom time and again. And I realized I needed some additional support to stay mentally, spiritually and emotionally strong during all of it so I didn't self destruct because it was just too much. I became Reiki certified in April and implemented a very strict reiki, meditation, journaling & physical exercise morning routine that I did not stray from. Many times throughout the year I mentioned how I believed all of this was meant to happen just to bring this very unshakeable anchor to my day. Obviously there were many important reasons for all the change but all of those reasons are pretty much one major reason, right? Evolution. I took a lot of things back into my own hands and felt like I was starting at square one. I mean, I was. I am. With much more knowledge and experience but I did, I am, starting over. It feels good. Right. Definitely uncertain - all the time - because LIFE! Hello! But at the same time there is and has been a deeper knowing underneath all the noise. I started breath work in September with a coach. They're 2.5-3 hour sessions in which I enter a different state of consciousness through breathing and unlock, unearth, MOVE and RELEASE energy through breathing. It is WILD. It is wild. No conversation could have prepared me for what it's like to actually experience it. The visions I see, the things I hear. The SOUNDS I release. Just like, honestly amazing. I am amazed at the tool and what it has done for my self concept, perception and how I see life. 7 sessions down and it's like I have new eyes. I'll probably do a whole separate post on that alone once I finish all 12 but anyway. I know I'm not alone in the 2024 teardown. Karmic 8 years do that. And Thank God for it honestly. We're not here to be comfortable and feel good all the time. We're here to discover who and what we are not, to realize who and what we are. And the only way to do that is to LIVE and embody who we are not and "change outfits" and put on something that fits. That was MADE for us. Meeting ourselves, over and over again, through meeting our "dopplegangers" no? Those who look like us in the mirror but maybe aren't necessarily us yet. Becoming. So here we are. 2025. Almost officially year of the Snake so let's embody that spirit. The snake doesn't feel shame or embarrassment when shedding its skin, this is part of its existence. It just is. Have gratitude for the times you embody who you are not, because without that, how would you know how the truth feels?

I love you. My birthday is next month so I started a lil 6 week birthday bootcamp on the 31st which I will breakdown in my next post. xx